53 Things We Just Learned About Super Smash Bros. Wii U

So Nintendo held a big Nintendo Direct tonight for Super Smash Bros. Wii U, and it basically laid out what we all suspected: this is going to be the definitive version.

In fact, the video spends a lot of time crapping all over the 3DS version—which was pretty good!—in favor of the upcoming HD Smash, which comes out on November 21 in North America for Wii U. This is going to be the Real Deal.

For those of you who don’t have time to watch the whole video, here’s the full list of features revealed:

Some of the 3DS game’s hidden characters, like Ganondorf and Ness, will be unlockable from the start in the Wii U version.

The Wii U version has a much higher resolution. Duh.

Eight-player Smash! You can have up to eight people on some stages.

Bigger stages! Like Hyrule Temple.

A new feature called Danger Zone—some stages will have lava patches that hurt/kill you.

One stage, based on Donkey Kong Country Returns, lets you battle on two different planes at once—one in the background and one in the foreground.

More stages than the 3DS version.

…Including a Miiverse stage that will highlight Miiverse posts for each Smash fighter as you play.

Palutena will add commentary when you play as Pit, not unlike Snake’s codecs in Brawl.

Metal Face from Xenoblade Chronicles will appear on Gaur Plains.

Ridley will appear… but he’s not playable. 🙁

In addition to Stock and Time modes, you’ll be able to fight with Coin Battles.

Stamina Battles, too! In those, you’ll lose when your HP gets to zero, an inversion of the usual Smash formula.

There’s a mode called Special Smash where you can change around rules and do all sorts of weird things.

You’ll be able to change item frequency in this one. (Unlike the 3DS version.)

There’s a function called My Music that will let you set how frequently you want songs to appear during each battle.

You can change the menu music, too.

The Wii U version will have way more music than the 3DS version did.

More composers too!

You can collect CDs in the game that will get you more tracks.

There are way more challenges than the 3DS version.

Classic Mode will be way different—you’ll advance based on how well you do, rather than which order you want to do things.

Clearing Classic Mode will get you individual character movies.

All-Star Mode will be in reverse-chronological order this time around.

The new Event Mode will let you take on a whole bunch of different themed battles.

The Wii U’s version of Smash Run is a board game mode called Smash Tour in which you’ll compete on a big ol’ Mario Party-style map, collecting fighters and items as you move your Miis around the board.

There’s a Target Blast mini-game in which you launch big ol’ bombs at various targets.

You can play with other people in the Stadium now, even for Target Blast.

There’s a new mode called Special Orders, in which the big bosses Master Hand and Crazy Hand will give you unique challenges and commands.

Master Fortress is a new sort of boss battle in which the Master Core (from the 3DS version) will actually turn into a big dungeon that you have to conquer.

You can play the game with lots of controllers, from the Wii U GamePad to the Wii remote/nunchuk.

There’s a GameCube controller adapter, as we knew. You can use GameCube controllers to play.

You can use the 3DS as a controller, too.

You can bring custom characters from your 3DS to your Wii U.

Lots more trophies in this one, mostly from console games.

You can get Final Smash trophies by surviving All-Star mode with each character.

There’s a Trophy Box! So you can show off all these new trophies, if you feel compelled.

Photo Studio is a new mode in which you can arrange your trophies and take ridiculous pictures that will certainly not be abused at all.

You can collect trophies in multiplayer Trophy Rush.

With a strange new mode called Masterpieces, you can actually play timed demos of classic Nintendo games like Super Mario World and Earthbound. Then, once your timer is up, you can go buy them on the Wii U’s virtual console. Capitalism!

You can level up your amiibo characters. They’ll gain experience fighting and boost stats when you give them equipment to gobble up.

The Wii LAN adapter is compatible with the Wii U. Use that if your wifi sucks!

You’ll get notifications in the main menu!

You can team up with people sitting on your couch to play online together.

Eventually, Nintendo is going to add a mode where you can host and join tournaments.

Nintendo’s gonna have tournaments, too.

The GamePad will mirror the screen and can also show information about how much damage characters have taken.

Not only can you take screenshots, as you can in the 3DS version, you’ll be able to draw on them with the GamePad! Rad. Eventually you’ll be able to share them online, too.

Voice chat… but not in-game. Just between matches.

Stage builder! You’ll be able to make your own stages on the GamePad.

…You’ll also be able to share stages, eventually. That feature isn’t ready yet.

All the Joins The Battle movies are in the game!

If you buy both the 3DS and Wii U versions and register them with Club Nintendo by January 13, you can get a two-disc soundtrack set from Nintendo.