Welcome back to āBackhanded Box Quotes,ā a collection of measured, thoughtful criticism from the user reviews of Metacritic and elsewhere.
What are you dressing up as for Halloween? Iām going as Medal of Honor: Warfighterās Metacritic score. No, make that Sexy Metacritic Score for Medal of Honor. Because the real one is ugly enough to make a freight train take a dirt road. Some civilian critics didnāt see it that way, though, so we begin with a couple of 10 scores given to it.
Medal of Honor: Warfighter
Released: Oct. 23
Critic: GameInterpretor (Metacritic)
⢠āLooking forward to DLC and even a sequel!ā
Score: 10
Critic: Drazat (Metacritic)
⢠āThe graphics blow me away with there astounding browns and shades of brown there is more brown in this game than any game before it.ā
OK, now back to the hating.
Critic: Hurricane 9 (Metacritic)
⢠āIf there were not an EA logo plastered all over the place, you might think it were a F2P indie game.ā
Score: 3
Holy shit, slamming both EA and indie devs? That is coldblooded and backhanded.
Critic: GamesMaster4Life (Amazon)
⢠āThis game is not to be recommended to anyone,no matter how much you hate them.ā
Score: 1 star
Critic: NinjaTwin (Metacritic)
⢠āSave your money and buy yourself a new shirt instead of wasting it on this rubbish.ā
Score: 0
The Unfinished Swan
Released: Oct. 23
Critic: kasparov5 (Metacritic)
⢠āIt is good but the graphics are lacking compared to modern fps games like Call of Duty.ā
Score: 5
Hotline Miami
Released: Oct. 23
Critic: UnbiasedOne (Metacritic)
⢠āIt would have been a hit in the year itās taking place in (1989) but for 2012, the eye strain, the aggravation and the urge to drive to the developers and beat them within two inches of their lives is not worth it, and $9.99 is defiantly not worth it. Again yet another pile of trash that will go straight to the top of the charts.ā
Score: 0
Take note folks: No matter how much you insist on Hotline Miami being worth it, it will refuse. For it is defiantly not worth it.
Backhanded Box Quotes will be an occasional feature of Kotakuās Anger Management, unless it isnāt.