No Assists in These Parting Shots

After alienating himself from the team and driving the NBA’s longest-tenured coach into retirement, Deron Williams was traded by the Utah Jazz to the New Jersey Nets. What better way to say “You can’t win without me,” than to do all the scoring yourself?

Tardvaris, a student at the U. of Wisconsin, supplies our game of the week with this superhuman effort. He and a buddy decided to play NBA 2K11, the Orlando Magic at the Utah Jazz, with 12-minute quarters. “Deron Williams was hot early, and I decided I was going to do something amazing: beat my friend scoring every single point with D-Will.”

He did just that. “168 points later, I was very happy.” Williams’ line, 66 for 119, including 19 of 42 three-pointers, three steals, five rebounds, six turnovers.

No assists. Here’s the box score!

Remember, all you have to do to get yourself featured in Box Scores’ Game of the Week is take a picture of whatever you’ve been playing – crappy cell picture will do – write up a couple sentences about why it was so compelling, and email it to me, owenATkotakuDOTcom, with “Box Scores” in the subject header. I will star all submitters, regardless of whether they are published. So be sure to include include your commenter handle, or your commenter page URL if it is different from your handle.

Now the Kotaku Sports open thread commences with the sports TV highlights for today and tomorrow. All times are U.S. Eastern.

College Hoops

The first weekend of March brings rivalry-matchup finales and championship games from smaller conferences. Tipping off right now is No. 2 Kansas and No. 22 Missouri’s annual hatefest, from Columbia (CBS). Not a rivalry per se, but No. 8 Notre Dame visits No. 16 Connecticut, on ESPN at 2 p.m.. A reeling No. 19 Villanova travels to No. 4 Pittsburgh (CBS, 4) and No. 21 Vanderbilt hosts No. 14 Florida on ESPN at 6. But the biggie today is No. 4 Duke at No. 13 North Carolina, college basketball’s best rivalry, with a first place finish in the ACC on the line. That’s on CBS at 8.

Conference tournaments: Today, the Big South (ESPN2, 4 p.m.) Atlantic Sun (ESPN 2, 6) and Ohio Valley (ESPN2, 8) crown their champions. Tomorrow, it’s the Missouri Valley championship (CBS, 2 p.m.) and West Coast Conference semifinals (ESPN2, 8 and 10 p.m.)

NBA

Toronto faces the Nets in London on NBA TV at 3 p.m. today. Tomorrow’s quadrupleheader is Chicago at Miami on ABC at 1 p.m., the Lakers at Spurs (ABC, 3:30); the Knicks at Atlanta (ESPN, 6:30) and Boston at Milwaukee (ESPN, 9).

NHL

Tonight’s games on the CBC: Chicago at Toronto or Montreal at Tampa Bay (7 p.m.) with Edmonton at Colorado in the 10 p.m. nightcap.

Motorsports

NASCAR’s Kobalt Tools 400 races from Las Vegas on Fox at 3 p.m. Sunday. Kyle Busch is the points leader after just two races.

Golf

The Honda Classic’s third and fourth rounds are on NBC at 3 p.m. today and tomorrow.

Remember, you may send Game of the Week nominations to owenATkotakuDOTcom, and flag it “Box Scores” in the subject header. Please include your commenter handle for proper credit.