29. 1492: Conquest of Paradise (1992)
Exhibiting some of Ridley Scott’s worst tendencies, the 1992 historical drama 1492: Conquest of Paradise is so poorly executed that it might make you sympathize with flat earthers. While Scott’s camera captures a staged rendition of Christopher Columbus’ expedition to the New World with operatic grandeur, there’s no substance behind its sails. The film is merely a string of shots, each resembling a glorified screensaver, featuring a saltwater-soaked Gérard Depardieu aimlessly wandering in colonial cosplay. This critique isn’t about how monstrous the real Columbus was or the film’s gross mythologizing of historical atrocities—it’s simply a dull, uninspired movie with nothing meaningful to say.
