The Long, Hard Search for the Infamous Mario Porno

You’ve seen the photos. Porn star Ron Jeremy dressed as Mario. The images weren’t simply some silly cosplay photo. Rather, they were promotional images for a dirty movie—a dirty movie that’s difficult to find.

https://lastchance.cc/ron-jeremy-sex-not-violence-is-beautiful-and-natural-5466746%3C/a%3E%3C/p%3E

Over on the Something Awful forums, forum user Doorknobjohnny began searching for the movie behind the photo, Super Hornio Brothers. There was a sequel, Super Hornio Brothers 2, released, not because the prequel was so popular, but because it was so long, it needed to be split in two.

The reason why the 1993 movie was so impossible to find is that Nintendo supposedly bought the film’s rights and took it out of circulation. The film’s tagline was, according to YouTube user NixiePixel, “It ain’t no game.”

An APB was put out over Something Awful, with members contacting the Museum of Pornography, Ron Jeremy himself, and some dude’s parents as they had a copy at one point, apparently. A VHS copy was located online, but for a US$300 asking price.

According to website Gameranx, by 2009 “a mysterious and anonymous benefactor” donated a copy to Doorknobjohnny for his viewing pleasure.

Gameranx called the film “disappointing”, noting scenes like Luigi and Princess Peach bumping uglies on a desk or Mario laying pipe with a spider lady. I don’t remember a spider lady in Super Mario Bros.. Then again, I also don’t remember hardcore fucking.

In the above gallery, sweaty porn star Buck Adams does his best King Poopa impression in a work safe video. Enjoy!

A Tale Of Miracles: The Internet’s Search For A Mario Porno [Gameranx]