Colorful. Bright. Cartoonish. These are all adjectives used to describe the light-hearted and airy adventures found in Insomniacâs Resistance series. What happens when Nintendoâs dark anti-hero Link comes on the scene? Glorious chaos.
In the realm of video game crossover fan fiction there are plenty of pairings that make perfect sense. Mega Man and Street Fighter, for instance, share a publisher, so the mind doesnât have to stretch too far. Dead or Alive and Rumble Roses both feature well-endowed women beating each other up, so that would work as well, although it would likely end up in the âmatureâ section.
The Legend of Zelda and Resistance: Fall of Man is not one of those natural combinations. With wildly different themes, atmospheres, and exclusive consoles, it would take a masterful fan fiction author to marry these two worlds in a way that makes any sense whatsoever.
He tried to say âWhy?â but it turned into a scream as the monstrous claws went through the poor manâs abdomen. Then, the claws separated vertically, ripping the man in half horizontally. Blood fell out of the body like a waterfall, and intestines went flying everywhere. I threw my sword at where the ripping began and it stabbed the monster, which then became visible.
We have found that master.
Thatâs an excerpt from daedalus the architectâs âLegend of Zelda: Fall of Manâ. See, the title takes part of The Legend of Zelda and combines it with part of Resistance: Fall of Man. In literary circles this is known as denouement (editorâs note: no it isnât).
Daedalusâs tale picks up at the end of The Legend of Zelda: Majoraâs Mask. Right off the bat the author completely spoils the gameâs ending.
âHoly Din,â I said gasping for breath. Even in my Fierce Diety form, that was hard.âthat was quite a fight.â Talt hovering over my shoulder, I saw Majoraâs Wrath dancing its death cry.
âWell Link, letâs get out of here!â Talt said. I nodded in response. I was about ready to leave when Majoraâs Wrath snapped one of its whips at me, wrapping me up. âLINK!â cried Talt, rushing to my aid. It seemed that the monster was going to commit suicide and take me out with it. So I braced for death; then everything went white.
Youâll notice right away that the story is written in first-person, perhaps a nod to Resistance, which is a first-person shooter. Or the author just wanted to pretend he was Link. Iâll believe the former, while secretly suspecting the latter.
As the Nintendo 64 epic comes to a close, Talt and the Great Fairy practice the magical art of foreshadowing.
We later arrived at the Great Fairyâs fountain. Talt whispered to her about something. She nodded her head in approval, turned to me, and said, âFor services rendered to this land and to my siblings, I grant you the power of regeneration. With this ability, you can heal the physical wounds of others and yourself using magic. You will also heal yourself at a very slow, but constant rate without the use of magic.
I know what youâre thinking: âWhy didnât he receive that powerful ability during his previous adventure? Itâs okay, Linkâs thinking it too.
I just stood there thinking: Nayru, why didnât I get this during my journey? I smiled and said, âThanks, Iâll use it wellâ I turned to Talt and said, âThanks for everything, Talt. Now Iâll leave this world. Goodbye.â After getting supplies, I went to the base of the clock tower, and Epona and I entered the Lost Woods.
Ah, the Lost Woods, the perfect setting for a mystical portal to another place and time. Link and his beloved equine companion soon find themselves in a very different set of woods, facing a very different sort of man.
Epona and I were trotting along in this forest when I came across a man covered from head to toe in black, unusual clothing. The man also carried a device, clutching it like I would my bow, so I assumed it was his weapon. I brought out my sword, pointed it at him, and commanded, âWho are you?â
Thatâs not a very nice way to greet a new friend, Link. I suppose it doesnât matter, because before the man can explain himself the opening quote from this story happened, showering Link and Epona with gore. Ew.
It was about 7-and-a-half feet tall, with four claws on the end of each of its thick arms. It had greenish reptilian skin, stained red where my sword struck, with ripping muscles under some thin armor. The head was sort of hunched over, the size of the head was a bit small for its body. The face was horrible, the mouth looked liked it had its lips sliced clean off, revealing huge, razor sharp teeth. The eyes, all six of them, were pure gold in color. It also had some sort of device infused to its back, which stuck out like spines. The armor and device was made of an alloy that I canât identify. I donât know what it is, but I know itâs dangerous.
This is where the author takes certain liberties with the character. Link, as has been established, is an expert at identifying alloys. He quickly reins the story in as the battle begins, Link reacting with the lightning reflexes of a seasoned warrior.
I got off my horse and strapped her to a tree. I went to the monster and pulled my sword out. Damn, now Iâll have to clean this later.
At this point in the story I was totally engrossed in this strange and wonderful adventure. Then daedalus has to go and do this:
When I was walking to my horse, she started getting out of control, pulling on her restraints like she was trying to get away from something. I got out my Lens of Truth and activated it, just in time to see one of those monsters tear my poor horse to pieces with those claws.
He. Killed. Epona.
What happens next? Who cares? Linkâs best friend and boon companion was just torn to bloody pieces. If I were Link I would have just lay down and died right there. Whatâs the point of living?
Thankfully I am not Link in this story; daedalus is, and daedalus Link has better uses for his rage and sorrow. He dispatches the strange creature with an Ice Arrow to the back, after which the armed soldier that was apparently watching the whole horse dismemberment thing finally decides to show himself.
The man ran up to me and said, âHey kid, why arenât you in a protection camp? You know weâre in a world war, right?â
I said, âWar? Against those monsters with the huge claws? The man commented on how he saw a horse carcass back a bit with the name Epona on a name tag around its neck. I told him that was my horse-Iâll destroy them for killing my horse.
Awww, he even gave the horse a collar. That⊠makes sense.
As much sense as what happens next. The soldier, confronted with a young elf boy in the woods, reacts as any real-world soldier would in a similar situation: He recruits him and teaches him about guns.
âA firearm is any weapon that uses a certain amount of explosive to make enough pressure to propel a projectile a certain distance.â We started walking a bit when he said, âThe chimera are a species of celestial origin. Their technology is hundreds of years ahead of ours and they reproduce using a virus to transform other living creatures into them, so there are multiple um.. strains of chimera. Variations of those monsters.â I would have asked what a virus was but he âshushâed me. I listened and I heared cooing sounds, similar to a bird. âSounds like a pigeon.â he murmured.
I said, âYes, I hear a pigeon. I also hear growling sounds, like a predator ready to pounce.â I told him I would like a shooting lesson now. He rejected the idea, saying this strain of chimera is invisible. I said, âI have an artifact that my people crafted that can see through illusions. These creatures-chimera you call them-are no different.â He told me to use it and gave me his big firearm.
Itâs Linkâs Carbine Training!
After a brief shooting lesson in which Link takes down a Chimera in three shotsâsomething I can barely do in the gameâhe finally asks the man his name. It is, of course, Nathan Hale, hero of Resistance and Resistance 2. The pair instantly form a tight bond, which is sure to come in handy as the story progresses.
Nathan was ready to advance when I held him back and whispered, âChameleons, get your small gun on the ready.â He did and commented on the fact that for further reference, itâs an HE .44 Magnum with glycerin rounds. I was lost so I said, âWhatever.â I got out and activated my Lens of Truth, got my gun at the ready, and scanned the tree-stumped field for chameleons. I found five of them and said to Nathan, âWe got 2 chameleons at 11oâclock, one at 12oâclock, and 2 at 1oâclock.â
And thatâs why they call him the Hero of Time.
Craving more? Of course you are. I wonât steal daedalus the architectâs thunder any longer. Hit up the link to read all ten chapters
Legend of Zelda: Fall of Man [FanFiction.net]